The Author's Bio

     Do a Google search on how to write an author's bio for yourself.  I'll wait here, but you will be a while.
It should be in third person.  No wait!  First person if you are sending query letters.  Talk about your life, or don't if you happen to be a hausfrau who is only dreaming of being a novelist.  Join a group and pay them a fee so you can out the group's name in the bio, but only if you've been published in that genre and only if you've been published by the right people.  Put in your educational background - but wait, you may not want to if it will alienate your readers or if you are cultivating mystique.  But it's all totally different if you are preparing it for wikipedia.  You can't just do one.  Gotta have fifty and one-hundered word versions.  You have to follow this list.  Any variations and your manuscript will most likely be discarded.  Above all have fun, but don't!
     I understand that it can be difficult to coalesce your life experience into a short blurb, and that many writers are hamstrung by their super-powered ability to take themselves way too seriously, but it just isn't that big a deal.  I was looking forward to it until I started looking into other's opinions on the matter.  Having a blog is way more important than having an author's bio, really.

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